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Home Settlement Belkarth
Location Crossroads Tavern
Race Argonian Gender Male
Health 25974
Reaction Justice Neutral
Pickpocket Easy Profession Drunkard

Laughs-at-Turtles is an Argonian drunkard who can be found at the Crossroads Tavern, the inn located in the town of Belkarth. When you speak to him, he will say one of the following:

"Wait ... wait. Where'd my tail go? Did you—oh, there it is. Close call."
"Want to see a party trick? I don't want to ruin the surprise, but it involves a bottle of wine and a clothes iron. And ... and probably some towels. It tends to be messy."
"Hey, ugly face! Get outta my way! I ... wait, I'm sorry. Your face is fine. It's just kind of blurry."
"I came out of an egg! Did you know that? Not everyone does. Come out of an egg, I mean. Wood Elves pop out of acorns. That's why they're so small. Wait. That can't be right. I guess I don't know where Wood Elves come from. Do you?"