User:Rpeh/The Lighter Side of Tamriel

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By rpeh

There was an old man from Bravil
Who was feeling most terribly ill
Since a medical fake
Had made the mistake
Of prescribing a Stinkhorn Cap pill.

I once knew a male Khajiit
Whose fur was incredibly neat.
I asked him his means
And was granted the scene
Of him cleaning his back with his feet.

They say that the ladies of Split
Are all quite incredibly fit.
But unless they're a quitter,
The men must be fitter
And have a great liking for... it.

There once was a man from Ald'ruhn.
It was said he could play any tune.
But an Orcish request
Proved too much of a test:
I doubt we'll be seeing him soon.

There once was a mighty young Nord,
Who ended up terribly gored.
He lost most his face
When he made the mistake
Of flossing his teeth with his sword.

The God that they call Dagoth Ur
Was naught but a cowardly cur.
The Nerevarine
Appeared on the scene
And chopped off his head in a blur.

The Altmer of Summerset Isle
Are famed for their wit and their guile.
But the rest of the races
Feel like punching their faces
And seeing them covered in bile.

The once was a young Breton lass
Who suffered from terrible gas.
While playing a game
She lit up a flame
And flew to High Rock with a flash.